During the holidays, family expectations can be a challenge to manage.  We all wish and hope that our family is as synergized  and drama free as we imagine and we expect that our spouses, partners ,and kids can assimilate as smoothly as possible with their grandparents, cousins and in-laws.  But what if they don’t or worse, what if our family gets chaotic?  

It’s important to understand that supporting each others’ endeavors whether they are big or small can strengthen your connection as well as individual personal growth.

In the anticipated days of the coming Fall months as new schedules arrive, we ask ourselves how do we stay intentionally connected with one another?

Picture this: you and your partner are in a disagreement, and your partner says or does something that suddenly cascades you into a different space. Rather than feeling minor frustration or annoyance, your emotions suddenly turn a sharp corner. It's like these emotions are pushing you into a deep dark hole and whatever your partner is saying, you can't hear anymore.    It's likely that you (and maybe your partner) are feeling flooded.

Studies show that the first 3 years after babies were born, a whopping 2/3rd of parents experienced a significant drop in their relationship quality. Being with the baby was so sweet but being together as partners turned bitter causing a significant increase in conflict in your realtionship.

Think of coming home from work after an awful day. Maybe you had a customer who was challenging, or a business meeting that may not have ended well. Maybe your car battery ran out and you had to travel longer in the rain, or your child was unwell all night and you haven’t slept a wink. What small things do you think would bring a smile to your face or a sigh of relief after facing such challenges?

Neurodivergence encompasses various perspectives and experiences, which may differ from conventional societal norms. As a counsellor, I recognize the unique assets it brings to relationships. Rather than focusing solely on challenges, let's explore how neurodivergent traits can enrich and enhance our connections. We can refer to these traits as strengths or forces!

As life-altering as experiencing trauma in your relationships is, it should not prevent you from experiencing intimacy and romance in the future. Learn about the various ways relationship trauma manifests itself and how to deal with it in an informed manner.

As we are now heading in to fall, the days are slowly getting shorter with us having less day light. Have you experienced any change in mood? Perhaps not wanting to go for that morning walk, or perhaps not wanting to meet your friend at that patio to have a barbeque?

One suggestion is to be intentional in planning time together with your partner. This doesn’t have to be daily, and it doesn’t mean taking hours out of your weekly schedule. Planning small pockets of time to sit together, talk (not about work, kids, pets, or schedules) is deeply important. Spending even ten minutes daily sitting quietly together, can be significant. You might want to create a boundary that you only want to know about your partner. Sitting with, listening, touching, and empathizing with your partner (and them with you)…these are almost like micro-moments. Their effect is powerful, however.

Since the conception of sexual behaviors and performance are all rooted in the brain, mental well-being has a direct correlation with these intimate aspects of our lives. On this World Sexual Health Day, learn about what trauma is and how it impacts your brain and creates obstacles in your sex life.

You may be considering couples (or marriage) counselling for you and your partner. Perhaps you’ve been together for what feels like a hot second. Maybe, you feel you’ve been together forever and the relationship is feeling a little stagnant. Conflict may be high, or it could be the mundaneness of your relationship that you’re finding makes for a feeling of being stuck. And you’re wondering if marriage counselling can work for you.

You are not alone if the thought of sharing your emotions brings up some fear or frustration. One reason sharing deeper things about yourself can be so challenging is that you might feel you are opening yourself up to either intimacy or judgment.