Four Tips for Neurodivergent Moms Navigating Their Postpartum Journey

Becoming a mom is a life-altering experience that often brings a rollercoaster of emotions. I am a mother of two little ones and can personally attest to the wide range of feelings that accompany welcoming a baby into the world ranging from love, joy, sadness, worry and moments of resentment. I recognize that adjusting to life after welcoming a new baby is a significant and often challenging journey.

Every mom experiences postpartum uniquely, and some may have challenges related to executive functioning, sensory sensitivities emotional regulation and parenting style. If you're navigating these challenges, I want to reassure you that your feelings and struggles are valid and not uncommon.

Here are four ways that neurodivergent moms can navigate their postpartum journey.  As we explore how neurodivergence and the postpartum period intersect I will also offer some strategies to help you navigate the challenges with confidence and self-compassion.

1) Navigating Sensory Overload:

Babies bring with them the yearning for skin-to-skin contact, to be cuddled, and soothed, and they make plenty of sounds from cooing to crying. The need for touch and the adjustment to the noise can be overwhelming. For someone with heightened sensory sensitivity, this can be overstimulating impacting the bonding experience between mom and baby.

Coping Strategies:

·   Create a neurodivergent-friendly environment: Tailor your home environment to meet both you and your baby's needs. Consider factors like lighting, temperature, and how you organize baby's items to reduce clutter

·   Identify your triggers and develop a plan for managing the sensory demands

·   Schedule quiet times for yourself perhaps when the baby is napping

·   Use noise-cancelling headphones, when appropriate

·   Engage in calming sensory activities to help self-soothe

2) Managing Executive Functioning Challenges:

Executive function refers to a set of mental skills essential for tasks like planning, time management, organization, and maintaining focus despite distractions. These skills are particularly important when caring for a baby. Your daily routine likely includes managing feeding schedules, naps, doctor appointments, and household chores. Juggling these responsibilities can feel overwhelming, especially when a baby's needs are unpredictable and essential for their growth and development.

Coping Strategies:

·   Use a day planner to determine the day's priorities and break tasks into manageable steps

·   Set alarms or reminders to stay on track

·   Utilize visual planning tools and applications like Trello, Cozi, and Family Organizer to organize your day

3) Managing Emotional Regulation and Mental Health:

Studies show that neurodivergent mothers are at a higher risk for postpartum anxiety and depression. It's important to monitor your moods so you can recognize signs of postpartum anxiety or depression and understand how they may be impacting your life.

Coping Strategies:

·   Practice self-compassion by allowing yourself to ask for help and take breaks when needed.

·   Another strategy for emotional regulation is using the RAIN acronym to practice mindfulness (adapted from Tara Brach).

R-recognize, notice and identify the emotion you are feeling. Pause and acknowledge the emotion without trying to change it.

A-allow the emotion to be there without resisting or pushing it away. Accept that it's okay to feel this way.

I-investigate the emotion with curiosity, non-judgmentally such as asking yourself questions like, "Where do I feel this in my body", and "What thoughts are connected to this emotion?"

N-nurture yourself with self-compassion and support. This could involve placing a hand over your heart and offering yourself a self-soothing message.

4) Adapting Parenting Styles:

As a neurodivergent mom, you might find that traditional parenting approaches don't align with your needs or those of your baby. That is completely okay! Finding ways to adapt to your unique style of parenting that may involve unconventional routines such as sensory-friendly activities may bring more comfort to you and your baby.

Coping Strategy:

·   Learning to accept what your needs are and prioritizing those, so you show up as your ideal version for you and your family.

Remember, as Brené Brown wisely said, "You don't have to do it all alone. We were never meant to." If any of this resonates with you and you would like support, please contact me at Panorama Wellness Group. If you would benefit from individual support, I provide counselling for neurodivergent moms in Langley, BC and would be honoured to walk alongside you.  To learn about me and the services I provide, please visit my bio here: https://panoramawellness.ca/jodi-bridges

Upcoming Webinar: Surfing the Journey of Motherhood

To support you during this transformative time, colleagues from Panorama Wellness Group and I are offering a webinar series, "Surfing the Journey of Motherhood." This series will provide valuable insights and strategies for navigating the physical, mental, emotional and relational waves of parenthood. If you're interested in joining us, please see the details here.