Tips for Maintaining Balance as a Working Mother of a Preschooler
As a working mother of an almost three-year-old myself, I can confirm that sometimes even 24 hours in a day seem little for accomplishing everything that I want done both personally and professionally. After becoming a parent your own needs and priorities often take a back seat to accommodate those of your child and to ensurethat they grow up healthy and happy. It is difficult not to feel low or inadequate at times, especially when you cannot be around your child around the clock, and the ‘working mother’s guilt’ sets in. The stress of managing childcare along with societal expectations and financial pressures can also get to you.
We all have different personal aspirations. Wanting to excel in your career or being financially independent should ideally not be source of any negativity, irrespective of your gender or socio-cultural position or opting for parenthood. Raising a child is a unique experience, full of challenges and rewards like no other. And the pre-school stage is equally special, with never a dull moment. Kids aged 3-5 tend to have fantastic imaginations and are brimming with curiosity and creativity. Striking the right balance between professional and personal commitments can contributesignificantly to your overall well-being and unlock long-term health and productivity benefits. So, here are some suggestions you can use to handle the overwhelming aspects of being a working mother of a pre-kindergartener and achieve a work-life equilibrium:
Liberate Yourself from Mom Guilt: In most cultures, the majority of domestic labor is dumped upon the women of the household, and this leads to a constant feeling of failing or never being enough. Mothers often get caught in a never-ending cycle of self-blame and guilt, especially if you are working. No matter how much you push yourself, you feel like you are always falling behind. This can cause frequent burnouts, or an increase in anxiety and depression. Extreme burnouts can also at times manifest as depleted mother syndrome. So, start by consciously disengaging with the negative feelings of inadequacy or shame during moments when you realize you are getting stuck in their vicious cycle.
Identify and Acknowledge Your Limitations: To properly organize your personal and professional worlds, you need to understand where you need to draw the line. You must mindfully create some healthy boundaries, which must be non-negotiable. This will help in striking the best possible ratio between your time and energy on any given day.This exercise might take time as it is not as simple as solving a math problem by simply devoting a fixed amount of time to your family, work, and own self. It is about being present where you are needed the most, when it matters the most.
Plan and Structure Creatively: Time is a precious commodity for every working parent, and you can maximize your schedule by using some simple time-saving hacks. Like preparing your meals in advance or using your lunch break to run errands. You can also officially ask for flexible timings so that you do not waste time being stuck in rush hour traffic or opt for work from home to save on the travel time.
Delegate Whenever Possible: Do not hesitate to ask for help when you have too much on your plate. Whether it is asking co-workers or your family and friends for assistance, avoid doing everything on your own. If you have a partner/spouse, then communicate with them openly about your needs and ask them to pitch in with the household chores and childcare. There is absolutely no shame in requiring help as it does indeed take a proverbial village to raise a child.
Focus on Self-Care: In order to play the variousroles in life efficiently, you need to carve out time for yourself at regular intervals. Studies have shown that taking me-time is essential for it improves productivity and has many physical and mental health benefits. Doing things that help you relax like listening to soothing music or drawing yourself an aromatic bath as well as engaging in hobbies you enjoy, all promote an internal sense of contentment, joy, and serenity.
Practice Positive Affirmations: Even during the roughest phases of parenting, a daily reminder of how your work is enabling you to contribute to your family finances and helping you set an example of what professionalism looks like for your child/children can go a long way. Practicing positive affirmations daily either just after waking up in the morning or before going to bed at night canempower you to overcome self-doubts and negativity. It is a simple method of boosting your belief in yourself.
Seek Professional Help: Remember that there are always resources as well as mental health professionals available in case you are confused about where and how to accomplish a work-life balance. It is only natural to feel overwhelmed or unable to deal with the numerous parental and/or professional stresses simultaneously. A therapist can provide you with individualized solutions catering specifically to your needs, help you identify your stress triggers, and teach you relaxation techniques too.
If you are looking for support in this area, there are a number of us who are parents and counsellors at Panorama Wellness Group. We offer in person and online services through our offices in Langley and Surrey, BC. Feel free to contact our experienced team of counsellors at Panorama Wellness for any further queries.
