Is counselling for men too?
Like many men, you may feel a bit uneasy at the thought of going to counselling and you wonder what practical benefit there could possibly be from sharing about yourself. If you are reading this, one part of you likely has a hunch that counselling could be beneficial, yet another part of you wants to stay still and not risk the unknown. Counselling might bring up many images in your mind that could make it feel safer not to reach out. And you’ve mostly heard women talk about going to therapy, so may wonder…is counselling for men too?
Below are a few thoughts you may have had when you’ve considered counselling:
The past is the past, and it feels easier to leave it there.
In life, you might place a high value on getting back up and moving forward as quickly as possible. You even see that challenges and stress are natural and, at times, they can be embraced. However, it is important that you can confidently differentiate between healthy stress and when something is too heavy to bear alone. For example, situations and experiences that ‘stretch’ you are a good thing, but experiences that seem to continually catch you unaware or cause lasting pain should likely be reflected on. As you learn to cultivate curiosity toward yourself, you can find adaptive ways to act differently and avoid unnecessary stressors in your future.
Men don’t need to talk
You may imagine counselling as being full of ‘fluffy’ conversations and talking at length about your history, just for the sake of it. If that were the case, you would have a good reason to feel nervous . If you are like me, you want to know ‘why’ you are being asked to do something, especially if it is new to you. When the relationship fit is correct, you have experienced more calmness and maybe even some clarity about your life. This gives you hope that prioritizing these kinds of opportunities within counselling would make all the difference for you.
I’m too busy!
At this point, you may have noticed yourself getting anxious when considering potentially slowing down for a counselling appointment. You are not alone and it is normal for your brain to want to shift your focus toward distractions when you feel some discomfort. Stay with me. The truth is, your life is busy and you rightly hesitate to add in one more thing. Examining yourself at different levels can help ensure a wise choice. As an example, if you took your car in for a pit stop, it might initially seem counterintuitive if you wanted to make it to the finish line. Yet, you know that without this pause, your car won’t run as it could for the rest of the race. Functioning at your best requires you to consistently and appropriately prioritize yourself.
I am the problem so why bother?
You may have received messages throughout your life that have led you to believe, deep down, that you are substandard. Within this potential belief, it may seem somewhat rational to think that acknowledging your challenges will lead to confirmation that you are a lost cause. In contrast, when you find a safe, compassionate counselling relationship, you can begin to take in the ‘nutrients’ you will need to gain mental health and personal growth.
As a clinician, I work collaboratively with my clients to provide a clear understanding of how therapy will look. Practicing new tools in session together, helps build confidence as you grow and explore health and healing in your life. I would be honoured to talk to you if you are wondering if we will be a good fit. I invite you to reach out to Panorama Wellness and book a complimentary 15 minute phone consultation.
