Why I Love Counselling

One week after my 50th birthday, I crossed the stage to officially become a therapist. I was wearing the cap and gown, holding my diploma, and thinking, I wish I had done this earlier in life.

At the same time, I knew I was exactly where I was meant to be.

Starting a new career at midlife isn’t something everyone does. It’s scary to leap into something new, especially after decades of life in other roles. But for me, becoming a counsellor wasn’t just about a job change — it was a calling I couldn’t ignore any longer.

Why I Became a Therapist

I became a therapist because I wanted to help women and couples recover from traumatic experiences. Trauma can show up in many ways — and it doesn’t always look like what you might imagine.

In my blog "Is It Trauma?", I talk about the difference between big “T” trauma and little “t” trauma.

· Big “T” trauma includes life-threatening events, serious accidents, natural disasters, physical or sexual assault, and other experiences that overwhelm our ability to cope.

· Little “t” trauma might not seem as dramatic, but it can still be deeply damaging — things like ongoing criticism, emotional neglect, toxic relationships, or chronic stress. Over time, these smaller but persistent experiences can change the way we see ourselves and the world.

Whether it’s a big “T” or a little “t,” trauma leaves its mark. It can affect our bodies, our emotions, our thoughts, and our relationships. And it often sticks around until we have the chance to process it in a safe, supportive environment.

That’s where counselling comes in.

Moments That Remind Me Why I Love This Work

I recently had a couple of sessions where we used OEI (Observed & Experiential Integration) — an approach related to EMDR that helps the brain process and integrate difficult experiences.

Now, I’m not going to pretend I can fully explain the neuroscience of how it works (if anyone tells you they completely understand the brain, they’re lying!). But I can tell you what I saw:

A client who came in feeling overwhelmed, crying, and weighed down by a specific situation… walked out of that same session calmer, lighter, and able to see it in a whole new way.

The shift wasn’t just emotional — you could see it in their body, their breathing, even the way they sat in the chair. Those moments? They’re gold. They’re why I keep showing up.

Working with Couples

Couples work is another area that constantly reminds me of the power of counselling.

I’ve sat with couples who came into my office convinced their relationship was over. They were ready to divide assets, move out, and start fresh separately. But through intentional conversation, compassion, and some very real work, they found a way to reconnect and move forward together. Watching that kind of transformation is incredible.

On the flip side, I’ve also worked with couples who tried everything to repair their connection — and ultimately decided to part ways. And you know what? That can be just as fulfilling to witness. Because when people choose a healthy way forward, with clarity and respect, they’re creating space for a new chapter that aligns with their well-being.

Laughter, Tears, and Everything in Between

One of the things I value most about my work is that it’s not one-dimensional. Yes, there are tears in my office — and I’m honoured that clients trust me enough to cry in front of me.

But there’s also laughter. Sometimes it’s celebrating a victory — like setting a boundary that sticks. Sometimes it’s laughing at one of my awkward moments when I put my foot in my mouth.

Sometimes it’s the relief that comes from realizing you’re not alone in what you’re feeling.

Counselling isn’t just about working through pain; it’s also about finding lightness, even in the middle of difficult seasons.