8 Ways to Support a Family Member with Depression
With around 5% adults suffering from depression according to the latest World Health Organization estimation globally, depression is one of the most common mental health disorders that humankind grapples with at present. Learn how to mindfully help a family member who is struggling with it.
The most important relationship in our life is the one which we have with our own selves. And depression impacts it immensely, often altering our perceptions towards our own self, as well as the world around us. The discovery of someone’s depression affects their whole family unit, with different members reacting to the news differently. The fact that a loved one suffers from depression introduces tension and uncertainty into family equations and parents, partners/spouses, and children can end up feeling alienated, guilty, or hurt too. Familial relationships can even at times worsen the depressive symptoms of the sufferer.
But studies about family cohesion (the emotional bond between family members) have shown that if done right, family support can act as a buffer and help in the recovery of depressed individuals, especially in adolescents and young adults. Healthy and strong ties with friends and family have a healing effect and provide the sufferer with a sense of belonging, comfort, and happiness. Here are some simple steps you can take to positively contribute to the journey of a loved one who has depression:
Educate Yourself: Before discussing the matter with anyone else including the sufferer, you first need to learn about depression and its various types—major, persistent depressive, bipolar, postpartum, and seasonal affective—and know that depression manifests differently in everyone. The more you know, the easier it will be for you to understand what the depressed individual is going through. You must also have enough knowledge about the disorder, so that you can support your family member in social or public settings if need be and be able to debunk the stereotypes and stigma attached with depression that generally exist in society.
Start a Conversation: It is never easy to broach something as complicated and loaded a topic as depression but one must reach out to a loved one struggling with it, even though you may worry about hurting or offending them. The correct way to go about this is by ensuring that the sufferer is ready to talk about their condition and the environment/place is appropriate. Express your concerns with compassion. Avoid ambushing them as they are more likely to act closed or defensive towards what you have to say if you do so. Meeting in person is the best, but if that is not feasible then any other form of face-to-face interaction is recommended instead. Also, since communication is a two-way process, so it is equally important to make them feel heard.
Respect Their Boundaries: As difficult as it may be, you must allow the sufferer their privacy and personal space. You must make sure that they don’t feel claustrophobic as family members can often act intrusive or over-bearing, even if they mean well. If you truly wish to empower someone with depression then start by treating them with respect, irrespective of their medical issues, and not thinking any less of them just because they have a mental health disorder.
Offer Companionship: It is common for a person with depression to experience exhaustion and lack interest, making even small tasks harder for them to accomplish. They might even withdraw socially and isolate themselves. Nonetheless, drop them messages and texts to let them know they are not in this alone. Be willing to accompany them for their appointments and participate in family therapy sessions if required. You can also accompany them on walks or plan outdoor picnics as spending time in the peace and quiet of nature is therapeutic for the mind and spirit.
Provide Positive Reinforcement: It is common for depressed individuals to think of themselves in a negative light or have low self-esteem. They might be overly critical of themselves, and feel guilt, hopelessness, or frustration often. It is important for their family members to remind them of their positive qualities frequently and to avoid blaming themselves for their hardships. Appreciate their courage and efforts as they recover. Any kind of judgement will only hinder their progress.
Encourage Self-Care: Proper sleep and nutritious meals are paramount for recovery. Since depressed individuals struggle with even basic household chores, offer to help them out with home-cooked meals or by taking care of their errands so that they can rest. Motivate them to be physically active as often as possible. Taking them to a place of their choice like a spa, favourite park or café, or even out for a movie can help boost their mood and re-energize them.
Find Helpful Organizations: Reaching out to support groups for yourself and your loved one is equally important. Getting the opportunity to learn from other people’s experiences is a valuable source of both knowledge and inspiration. You can check out non-profit mental health organizations like Canadian Mental Health Association or Mood Disorders Society of Canada online and benefit from their forums and resources. In cases where self-harm is a possibility, have a list of helpline numbers handy.
Strengthen Their Commit to Treatment: Consistency is key to successfully treating depression. Encourage a positive attitude and enable the depressed individual to stick to their medication and therapy schedules throughout. And if they are willing to share, then talk to them about which aspects of the treatment seem to be working or not working for them.
So, if you have a family member who is undergoing depression, then do not feel helpless or disheartened as help is available. Ensure that you do not burnout yourself while caring for them. Even though there is no magical cure for it, depression is a treatable mood disorder. IT IS NOT A PERSONAL FLAW OR WEAKNESS. Many individuals, even celebrities, have shared their experiences with depression and how it did not stop them from living a full and happy life. If you need additional help, then do feel free to contact us at Panorama Wellness and our experienced team of counsellors and other wellness practitioners will gladly guide you through the numerous nuances of depression and how to deal with it in a wholesome manner.
If you are interested in connecting with me, I provide in-person counselling in Langley and Surrey and have evening and weekend availability. You can learn more about me by visiting my bio page.
