5 Tips for Connecting Better During Family Meals

One of the most significant features of our contemporary, heavily digitized existence is reduced family time. Irrespective of the socio-economic and cultural differences, there is a universal decline in developed countries across the globe when it comes to the amount of time an individual spends with their family, let alone bonding over food with them. The dining area, which was once a vibrant space for sharing and growing together, now only witnesses a few annual gatherings at best.

Meanwhile, the simple act of regularly sitting down to partake in food and conversation is one of the most instrumental habits parents can help their children cultivate. Over three decades of studies accentuate a whole plethora of mental, physical, social, and emotional benefits of dining together for both adults and children. Family mealtimes are remarkably nourishing and rewarding for the mind, the body, and the spirit and one of the most reliable ways to stay connected. Extensive research done by The University of Michigan: School of Public Health along with The Family Dinner Project, states that frequent family meals increase academic achievement and boost overall physical and mental health in children, with reduced risk of obesity, depression, and substance abuse. Regular family dinners are also associated with higher self-esteem and healthier eating habits in adults. While some of these benefits can be gained through other activities too, eating together is the one single activity that is known to provide all of them simultaneously.

So, here are a few ways you can facilitate more mealtimes with your family and in the process make some memories that can be cherished for a lifetime:

1. Plan and Create Opportunities

Begin with deciding on a fixed mealtime throughout the week to connect with each other. Dinners are ideal but even having breakfast or a weekend brunch together work equally well. Try to involve everyone in the meal planning and preparation, especially children. Cooking together can be a bonus, with each family member being assigned a task. But keep things simple, as the food does not need to be elaborate or gourmet. As long as it is nourishing and well-balanced, do not feel guilty about relying on take-aways or store-bought meals occasionally. Also, focus on the environment being open and inviting. It will set the tone for the meal, allow everyone to feel relaxed, and encourage them to participate.

2. Have Meaningful Conversations

Dining table conversations must be inclusive and light in nature. Try to avoid negative or serious topics, as they can be dealt with individually later. Talk about the highlights of the day or upcoming family events. Planning vacations or voting on matters concerning the family are ideal topics to discuss too. Some family members tend to be more reserved or defensive during conversations, so be mindful of contentious issues that can cause confrontation. Embracing the intermittent pauses or silences is important as well, as they facilitate quiet reflection or moments of contemplation. 

3. Practice Active Listening

Since communication is a two-way process, being aware of how one receives what is being said is also vital. Practicing active listening by focusing on the speaker and understanding their perspective with an open mind is crucial as it makes the speaker feel genuinely seen and heard. This method is all about understanding the speaker's message, emotions, and intent without any assumptions or bias of your own. Active listening helps bring clarity to a situation and build further trust among the family members.

4. Engage in Good Table Manners

Setting some ground rules or boundaries for mealtimes is a key step for maintaining a healthy family dynamic. Like treating each other with compassion and respect, irrespective of the hierarchy in the family. And ensure that everybody is courteous enough to leave the table only once everyone finishes their meal unless they have urgent matters to tend to. It is also necessary to declare the dining area as a “distraction-free” zone, where each family member is required to disengage with their devices (especially phones and television) during the entirety of the meal. This is a good opportunity for you as a parent to set an example for your children to limit their screen time in general and realize the importance of being present in the moment. This boundary also makes a strong statement by implying that everybody at the table is valuable, reinstating the significance of the family unit.  

5.  Start Slow and Be Patient

Introducing the concept of eating together as a family can be hard as you will need to work around the different personality types in the family and their routines to arrive at what works best for all of you collectively. The best move is to be realistic and start slow, with just aiming at eating a few meals per week together and then increasing the frequency to a daily breakfast or dinner. Do not give up even if the initial response to and experiences of shared mealtimes are not textbook perfect, as some family members might take time to warm up to the idea. Being consistent and persistent in your efforts will eventually bring about positive results. 

If you need additional help with improving family dynamics, then do feel free to contact us at Panorama Wellness and our experienced team of counsellors and other wellness experts will gladly guide you through any difficulties you might be facing as a family. With services such as family therapy, that is beneficial for improving communication skills and resolving conflicts, you too can boost your family relationships and develop loving and deeper connections with one another.